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Scenes and Monologues


Not all of my writing is for the invisible masses. Much of my writing is for the masses who even in their wildest dreams can't achieve invisibility.Those masses who have cramped into hot and tiny spaces to see my work performed.

Some of these scripts (mainly the monologues) have been developed in the Gotham City Improv program. I have performed some of them myself and will try to post appearance information when I can.

Notice to Performers

If you want to perform any of the scripts, simply ask me. I severely doubt that I will say no or ask for money. I'll probably just want a free ticket and/or a copy of any audio or video versions you produce. All scripts are copyright by me (Rev Jay Goldstein) and I reserve all rights and control including but not limited to performance and publishing rights. You may not edit or change these scripts in any way. If you need a line or lines changed for any reason I insist doing all rewrites myself, 



The Case of the Sinister Squirrel: A three-act parody of old detective films with a psychedelic twist. (5 - 7 actors)

Surbananas: A typical scene between neighbors on a sunny afternoon. Except one of the players is nuts. (2 actors)

Mr. Dentist Commercial: Dr. Smatz brings you an invention to help you through the struggle of home dentistry. (3 actors)

Gyn-o-mint Gum Commercial: Finally, a gum that doesn't let you down in the female discomfort relief department. Also from Dr. Smatz. (3 actors)

The Hun Sketch: A job interview taking place in a small recruitment center during the sixth century. (2 actors + a few extras)

The Satanic Kitchen: Join Chef Hesufus for a lesson in cooking that makes Cajun food look like ice cream. (2 actors)

Wheel of Therapy: Finally a game show that taps into the psyche of America and makes a half-assed attempted at fixing it. (5 actors + 2 extras)



The Banker: The mind-numbing efficiency of modern banking has changed the face of bank robbery, maybe forever,

The Indelicate Instructor: For this educator, it's her way and the highway. Just because she says so.

Spiritualityland: It's wacky fun for the Brothers of the Falling Dove when they're saved from financial ruin by becoming a theme park.


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